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Member since 04/2004

Something Good

One day there was a terrible, no good, very bad day. Very bad day. Let me repeat: very bad day.

Near the end of this no-good day, I drove more than usual, sat in fucking traffic more than usual, got home late, banged my knee hard. Had to clean the back seat of the car to hopefully remove the overpowering scent of apricot dragonfruit sweet Lifewater spilled during aforementioned traffic. I was perhaps a bit too dramatic with a small one who rarely gets in trouble and made a smelly, thoughtless mistake, and I felt guilty because I never want her to be in trouble - not even when she honestly should be.

You know what? It all sucked.

And then Chris pulled out the hamburger to make us dinner on the grill and it was rotten.

I mean, it's not a big deal, right? Make something else. Except (to be honest) I need to go to the grocery. We didn't have any other fresh meat. Frustrated, he asked me to not buy hamburger in the way the makes it affordable to have fresh meat in the house. It was too damn much.

It wasn't a big deal. It was a pound and a half of hamburger.

I cried.

I walked away to cry by myself. To be alone. To cry.

Chris, bless his heart, followed me into the bedroom, shut the door, and told me to calm down.

Calm down. Honestly, I was being calm. I was fighting to stay calm. I was crying while I folded laundry, by myself, my lips compressed tightly together. And he walked in and told me I needed to calm down.

How calm did he want me to be? I nearly lost it and said everything horrible thing about myself and him that might possibly every be true but isn't. I stood there and held it inside. And he grabbed my wrist and pulled me over his lap.

I asked him what he thought he was doing, even as I cried. We both knew the princess was awake and aware.  And already upset because I scolded and lectured and fussed and metaphorically stomped my feet. He pulled down my yoga pants and smacked my behind.

Not hard. Not loud. Just enough to make me want him to do it like he wanted to touch me, instead of smack me. He lectured. He offered his opinion. I cried some more, mostly because he was telling me I was overreacting. I tried not to get angry, tried not to say more than I absolutely had to say. I just cried and stayed where he put me and wished he was comforting instead of smacking and wishing that something good would happen.

Something good was happening, only we were both too hungry to see it. I was too upset to see it, and he was too tired of my horrible no-good very bad day to see it.

So I said something I shouldn't have. He went out to get dinner to feed us. I cried some more.

Last night, Chris forced innumerable orgasms on me (all right, not innumerable... but ten. I felt like I was dying.) and then fucked me. I loved every second he touched me and wanted more - without the orgasms - of the contact. But the rich pleasure wasn't the same as those few minutes I laid across his thigh and cried into the duvet.

I want the something good to come back.

Posted by sparkle on 11 March 2012 at 11:19 PM in Slice of life, sparkle | Permalink | Comments (7) | TrackBack (0)

Resistance

I've been quiet for quite a while. Some of this is because life has gotten in the way. My health hasn't been great (although I've been happy to discover that part of the problem was anemia, and that's eased up by finding a better iron supplement), and there have been big non-disciplinary changes in my and W's lives.

But more than that, it's because discipline hasn't been happening, or has been happening in frustrating ways, or has been complicated in ways that I haven't been able to put into words. I've spent a lot of the past two years or so feeling rather inarticulate about many things.

I'm still rather inarticulate, but I've decided I'll go ahead and try to write something, because it's entirely possible that I will find words once I start writing.

W and I have been on hiatus with discipline off and on for nearly two years now. Contrary to my disciplinary fantasies, W does not take easily to being in charge. She struggles with it, and many of her own physical and mental health issues were getting in the way. On top of that, she didn't seem to be entirely clear about benefitting from this arrangement on her own behalf, and that was building up a lot of resentment for both of us. So, not quite two years ago, I asked to take a break until she was ready to be the one to re-initiate.

Continue reading "Resistance" »

Posted by dykegrrl on 13 February 2012 at 09:30 AM in Discipline, Dyke Grrl, Health, Musings | Permalink | Comments (6) | TrackBack (0)

Dreams of Spanking: Congratulations Pandora, Haron and Zille

Dreams-of-Spanking_breakfast021_thumbHello and happy holidays.  It's been a busy year for lots of reasons and sadly this blog has suffered neglect.  2012 will be better, I promise, but I'm thankful that you still come and see us.  All of us have experienced a lot of changes over the seven years the PB has been up.  Some we've shared here, others we haven't. But we've never stopped caring about TTWD, each other or the many wonderful men and women who read here and care about the topic. 

Dreams-of-Spanking_jodhpurs50_sizedBut enough about that, on to the reason for this blog post. Over the past two years I've been following Pandora Blake's quest to create a spanking film and photo site quite closely.  Today that site, Dreams of Spanking, went live. There's lots of wonderful content and I like it for reasons I discuss on my blog, but my main reason for mentioning it here is that two of the Punishment Book's writers, Zille (in Caned in Jodhpurs) and Haron AKA Adele Haze (topping her lovely partner Jimmy in Her Ladyship's Breakfast) have filmed and worked on the site. I've put a couple of my favorite stills (with permission) up, but you should go and look at the site.

But most of all, congratulations to Pandora, Haron and Zille.  I've always known you dream of spanking, but it's wonderful to get to see what those dreams are. 

Posted by Mija on 23 December 2011 at 02:24 PM in Haron, Mija, Weblogs, Zille | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Loving Our Lurkers

LOL6aHow do we love our Lurkers? Let me count the ways. 

sparkle loves her lurkers enough to keep writing even if they keep lurking.

Zille loves you enough to search porn sites for spanking content. 

Haron goes to munches to meet you. 

Dyke Grrl set up and runs This Thing We Do. 

Bridget shows you how she looks dressed as a scarf. 

Angie shares her life, the light and the dark. 

Natty and Iris come out and play whenever they can. 

And me, Mija wants to know your favorite song.  

Welcome to Love Our Lurkers Day 2011!  And many thanks to the amazing Bonnie for her fantastic feats of organization. 

 

Posted by Mija on 10 November 2011 at 01:02 PM | Permalink | Comments (7) | TrackBack (0)

Caned Again (Again)

[This blog post has been written twice. The first draft got eaten by TypePad (boo!). I thought maybe this was a sign that this story wasn't meant to be shared, but Zille and Paul convinced me that if I didn't share the story here, pictures of my bottom and its cane marks could end up on Twitter. Since the last thing I want to do is show my bottom to the world for being caned for not going to the gym enough, and thus prove why I need to go to the gym more often, I'm busy re-typing this on the bus.]

As those of you who read here and / or Spanking Blog know, I've asked Paul to help me make better use of my gym membership by giving me 49 strokes of the cane, that's one for every dollar my membership costs, any week I don't make it to the gym at least three times. Paul gets to pick everything about the caning except the number of strokes. He can choose the cane he wants, what I wear and what position I'm caned in. This week I only went to the gym once. My reckoning was last night (Sunday).

Now I wasn't entirely sure I would really get caned for missing the gym this week. I had some very good excuses. First, my gym isn't air conditioned and last week it was very hot several days. So I didn't go to the gym for fear of getting over-heated. Then my mother showed up with all her loveliness and drama. I spent one whole day running errands with her. So I didn't go to the gym that day either. Saturday was taken up with a family party. I couldn't go to the gym Saturday. And Sunday I had to go out to brunch with a friend of my parents. And then I had to come home and get my writing sample ready. I couldn't go to the gym on Sunday. Suddenly all the days were gone and a week had past with only one gym trip. But of course Paul would understand.

He understood and even agreed I had very good reasons for not having gone to the gym. But that didn't matter. I hadn't gone and I'd asked him to punish me, to cane me, if I didn't go. I think if he had made the rule, he might have let me off this week. Maybe not. But because I asked for this and didn't say "except for weeks when it's really hot or I'm really busy" he followed through. And that's right. My gym opens at 5:30 AM and is open until 11:00 PM. We make time for things that are important and getting good use out of my gym membership and spending some time on my body is important. Truth be told, for all that my excuses are good, I could have gone.

Paul let me know yesterday afternoon that I was going to be caned. I struggled a bit with the knowledge. I was in the midst of wrestling with the text of my writing sample and couldn't quite make room in my head for the idea of being caned. So I buried myself in my work and didn't think about it. Even as evening progressed (with me still working away) I was in denial. You see, not only is my dad with us this week, my mom is here as well. They sleep in the bedroom next to ours. And unlike my dad, my mom is a light sleeper.

When I came out of the bathroom after doing all those evening things, the nursery cane was at the end of the bed. He was going to go through with it.

I thought about calling safeword on the caning. I mean, my mom.

But the thing is, part of me didn't want to. I want to be held accountable. I asked for this. So I cowardly tried to slide into bed with the vague hope that if I fell asleep fast (all that writing and editing had made me tired) Paul wouldn't cane me. After all, he's always trying to get me to sleep. He sternly told me not to get into bed.

So I took a deep breath and stood next to the bed, after closing the door, and, rather sadly, pushing my bed stool up against it. I hoped that like last week, this week he'd be using the cane over the knee (thats' what the nursery cane, which is short and thin, is made for). Sure enough, he sat down on the bed and had me pull down my pjs. I took them down and climbed over his lap. He spent a good amount of time adjusting my position, turning the top of my body closer to the head of the bed and my bottom further down his leg. What he was doing wasn't clear to me until the first stroke landed.

He was giving himself more room to swing so the tip of the cane would land harder.

The first stroke landed like a cut. The thing is, the nursery cane is very very thin and really really stings. That was true last week, but from the start it was clear this caning was a lot harder than the one the week before before. But, my brain cried, as I considered screaming, my parents are in the next room. So I pulled my hands forward (my arms had been folded behind my back) and started counting off the strokes on my right fingers, one at a time, while on my left I kept track in groups of twelve.

The thing about the thin cane is that it really stings. When Paul used it on me it felt more like a switch than a cane. By the time he reached twelve I could feel the tip marks crossing. The sting was terrible and I fought with myself to lie still. Paul will probably say I wasn't still, but I'm sure I mostly was. As I counted each one off it seemed an impossible number was left. When he reached twenty-four I started to panic and tears welled up in my eyes. I tried to keep my breathing slow and even because I knew if I started crying I might make noise. And making noise, being heard by my parents seemed much worse than even the hurt the cane was doing.

Strange as it may seem, at thirty-six I felt a sense of relief because it meant there were only twelve left. However much they might hurt, I could get through twelve more. Paul sped up and the strokes landed harder still and faster, making me gasp into the sheets. My feet fluttered as I tried hard not to kick. After quite a build-up of pain, it ended in a rush -- an almost "is that all there is?" moment. Then the burn started to soak in.

Paul kept me over his lap as he rubbed some LUSH dream cream into my bottom. It stings, but in a soothing sort of way. It hurt enough that I teared a bit as we snuggled close but I expected all signs to be gone by morning. This is so not the case. Almost 24 hours later and I'm still sitting tenderly, the right side of my bottom is still hot to the touch. Yes, this is me pouting a bit.

But not too much. I did, after all, ask for this. And I'm sure this week I will make it to the gym at least three times. Why am I sure? First because I want to. Second because my bottom really hurts. And third, my parents will not be here next weekend. Paul has let it be known that should he have to cane me next week, I won't be getting off with the nursery cane.

I'm going to be such a good girl. No, really.

Posted by Mija on 17 October 2011 at 09:46 PM in Mija, Slice of life | Permalink | Comments (4) | TrackBack (0)

Discipline & Punishment: Hello Again

The Punishment Book has been sleeping for a bit. I think this is inevitable -- we're all busy with lives and individual blogs. Some of us who are doing discipline and punishment may not want to write about it at the moment. Or maybe feel it's a story we've already told. At the same time, this blog, which was one of the only DD / disipline or WIIWD blogs 7 years ago is now one of many. 

But I thought I might tell you what's been up with me.  As those of you who read my own blog know, I finally finished my Ph.D. -- which means I lost my job. Paul and I are oddly in the position, for the first time in our relationship where I have to depend on him financially for everything. To put it mildly, this sucks (although he's been lovely about it).  I start a new part time job in January so hopefully I'm not going to get to used to it.

Meanwhile, not having money of my own has made me very aware of all my expenses. I don't waste money generally, but I have been making coffee and lunch at home a lot more often. I also have had to face the fact that I have been wasting money for months in one specific area.  My gym fees are $49 a month and I haven't been using it. I considered dropping the membership but the thing is I really do need to exercise more -- a yoga DVD here and there and walking isn't really cutting it. Plus, when I go, I enjoy my gym. So I asked Paul to give me 45 strokes of the cane any week I don't go to the gym at least three times. 

How did the first week go? I got 49 strokes of the small cane (with my dad sleeping in the next room -- yuck!) on Sunday night. Monday I went to the gym.  This week is already going better. 

Oh and for those of you still reading... hello again.  

Posted by Mija on 12 October 2011 at 06:07 PM in Mija, Slice of life | Permalink | Comments (11) | TrackBack (0)

H8 - Keep 'Em Out of Sight

Unknown

[I wrote this for my blog but I'm reposting it here because the discrimination against M/M spanking in the spanking scene is a total kink in my kink as Natty would say.  It makes me feel bad about myself and being part of this scene.  It's a face of homophobia, something I don't tolerate in any part of my life and I'm done tolerating in the spanking scene.  Be warned.]

As many of you know, I'm not exactly white. I'm Mexican American or as I prefer to call myself, Chicana. My father and my grandparents were born here in Los Angeles, but my great-grandparents came up from Zacatecas, Mexico.  I grew up in Los Angeles where having a white mother didn't make me anything but Mexican.  That said, I didn't experience too much discrimination.  My parents were very careful, protecting my sister, brother and me from the hate and fear that my father's face and skin color could evoke.  Still, up through the 1980s, they had a hard time moving into white neighborhoods.  Realtors refused to show them homes, tried to steer them to the browner parts of town.  And this was with my mother being white.

My uncle's family experienced all that and much more. My cousins don't have a white mother to temper their skin tone and that color's effect on the neighborhood.  When they moved into a white part of town, a "welcome wagon" met them with a chicken casserole and a request that they keep their children in the backyard for fear the sight of these brown children would lower property values.

So what you say?  Sad, but these are different times, right?

I say wrong and I'm calling our spanking community out on it. What groups like Crimson Moon and Ms. Margaret's SCONY are doing by not allowing M/M spanking in their groups, what SpankingTube is doing by not having M/M searches come up in their general search is the same damn thing as racial redlining was in a previous generation.  It maybe legally right, but it's ethically reprehensible.

But, but, some people don't like M/M spanking.  So what?  I don't like oral sex.  I don't ask that it be banned or shunted off into a corner so I don't have to stumble upon it.  I just avert my gaze and look at something I do like.  For those of you who think you can't learn to stomach M/M spanking, I urge you to free your mind and grow the fuck up.   If your arousal is so fragile that the sight or suggestion of M/M spanking can take it down, you may need some medical help.  Not everything in the scene has to exist specifically to get you off.

But, but, you agree with me.  Really. You wish these spanking groups or SpankingTube didn't discriminate.  Then live your beliefs.  Don't patronize them.   Don't use their sites.  Don't go to their parties.  And let them know why you're not.  That you'd like to, but because of their policy toward M/M spanking in our scene, you can't.  Then go places like Shadow Lane and SF-CP that are open to everyone whatever their orientation. 

But, but, Mija, you're ranting.  

Yes. Yes I am.  Don't hate. You know you don't want to.  And don't support people who can and do. 

ADDED: For more information on what SpankingTube is doing and why it sucks see this post by Paul: The Problem with SpankingTube.com

For a less rant-y take on M/M spanking see this post by Indy: Homophobia in the Scene.

 

----

PS. What did my uncle do? He had his twin brother move in next door with his family.  And then two put up a basketball hoop so all the kids played outside in the street, property values be damned.

Posted by Mija on 12 April 2011 at 03:06 PM in Mija, Musings, Weblogs | Permalink | Comments (8) | TrackBack (0)

About consent

This is just a quick note based on some comments we've had here recently.  We all freely to consent and in many cases initiated discipline / punishment relationships.

This is not a blog about wives and girlfriends who get beaten because that's the way wives and girlfriends should be treated by the men or women in their lives.  It's a real life discussion (albeit rather a slow one lately) by women who freely choose this because, for whatever reasons (it varies -- just ask us, we've been writing for six years here alone) it works for us. 

How does discipline / punishment work for me?  I like it.  I like the way it makes me feel.  How does it make me feel? Focused.  Loved.  Respected.  Looked after.  Powerful.  That Paul punishes me makes me, well, feel lust in my heart toward him.  If he decided he didn't want to do it anymore, I would feel the loss.  I asked for this -- I love that we have this dynamic between us, want Paul to have the power to punish me if and  when he decides to do it.

Go ahead and think me twisted or sick if you want.  But don't paint me as an unwilling victim.  I won't let you. 

Posted by Mija on 28 February 2011 at 04:03 PM in About the PB | Permalink | Comments (9) | TrackBack (0)

Demon Torrents

[My dad is currently out of town for a week.  The plan was that I'd be spanked each night.  Nice spankings though.  Except, well, I got in the way of that lovely plan.]

Criminal-minds As Paul reported in a not-at-all cryptic comment on Twitter: 

Not meant as ooo-look-at-us, but @eltercerojo went to bed genuinely scolded and spanked tonight. Both real and surprisingly resonant.

That's the short version.  All of it is true.  This is going to be the longer story, one maybe that will keep something like it from happening again anytime soon.  As I've reported repeatedly in the past, most of my being in trouble and punishments happen not because of anything willful, but because I either don't think things through or am not paying attention to what I'm doing.  

So what happened?  

Last night as I was getting ready for bed, I did a final check on my computer before letting it go to sleep for the night.  Paul noticed what it was busy doing and asked me what I was downloading.  

Continue reading "Demon Torrents" »

Posted by Mija on 14 January 2011 at 01:27 PM in Mija, Slice of life, Web/Tech | Permalink | Comments (8) | TrackBack (0)

Thoughts on the punishment – Part 1 – Ginger Figging

Zille Defeu figging ginger butt plug nal

I have so much to write about last night’s punishment that instead of trying to do one of my epic posts and it taking so long that I don’t post anything for the next three weeks, I’m going to try the mad notion of breaking things up into more manageable posts – crazy talk, I know!

I have so many emotions that I’ll start off with something more simple and basic: facts and thoughts about the new type of ginger butt-plug I made.

It was not an unmitigated success, but it did have a huge successful point in that we were a lot less concerned that we were going to loose the fig inside me, never to see it again. (As happened on Kink.com a while ago!)

However, I am used to carving ginger plugs with one notched area to simulate a butt-plug – and didn’t think about the fact that this time the notched area, which is usually where the sphincter ani internus (internal anal sphincter muscle) grabs aholt of the notch in the ginger, to keep it from sucking on in, or spitting it out (And the fact that I never trusted it for the former, and it didn’t work so great for the latter is why we were trying new methods!), was used by the flange from the cut-down butt-plug, and so the big fail was that I did not make the notched area longer nor make a second notched area....

So my bottom spent the whole punishment happily trying to spit that mean old ginger root right out! (I am pretty sure that actually ginger causes the anus to spasm and expel the burning foreign object from your bottom. I get why it would try to do this, but it’s something that needs to be worked around, because figging is the best punishment in the world. More on that later.)

I’m happy to say that the one worry I had, that the plastic flange would break the ginger did not happen, although this was a thick, tough old root. (We did the world a favour by stuffing it up my bum instead of leaving it for someone to try and cook with!) I should add that because this root was pretty old, it was stringy, which was probably good for tensile strength, but also meant it was very, very strong, intensity-wise.

Mr Defeu did not have it more than one-third up my bottom before the stinging began. I knew I was in serious trouble at that point!

To sum up on the actual fig-plug: yes, cutting the flange off a butt-plug works well, and at least on thicker ginger-roots, does not break it at the notch you have to cut in to hold it there. However, that notch either needs to be lengthened to give the anus room to grab on, as well, or a second notch needs to be put on. Unsure yet which will disturb structural integrity more. I will report back after the next punishment or discipline session in which ginger is used. (I hope soon!)

Okay, more about the experience of the ginger tomorrow!


In the meantime, I just found this blog, and loved the discussion of real punishment and the emotional journey it entails: Bonnie-Jo -- Life of a College Spanko

(Reposted from my blog, to share with my darling PB-ers! I'm such a dork that when I found out I was getting a punishment, one of my thoughts was, "Ohmigawd! I'll have something to post on PB!" [blush])

Posted by Zille Defeu on 12 January 2011 at 03:26 PM in Discipline, Education, Implements, Zille | Permalink | Comments (6) | TrackBack (0)

Less A Woman

At some point in the last ten years, I began equating my femininity with my sexuality. I don't know when or how this happened. I suspect that Chris's concerted efforts at making me feel beautiful and sexy - often while we were doing something sexually arousing - contributed. But, in the end, the mental connection was one I made.

That was all well and good until sometime around Halloween, when gynecological issues (you may know more detail than that if you follow my twitter feed) interrupted* our sexual and spanking play. Increasingly as November went by and by, I felt more and more blue. It might have been, as some have experienced, a natural consequence of the month and season. But when December and Advent came, and my mood continued in a relatively consistent downward spiral, I started being my introspective self.

You'll notice I stopped blogging. It's because I knew what I wanted to say. I knew I wanted to say it. But I didn't know quite how. I didn't know quite how to say it without it seeming like it was Chris's fault. I couldn't quite write it down without a solution.  I couldn't imagine having to respond to the practical advice of just be patient to anyone more than my doctor and overly patient husband.  (BTW, phone call to the doctor next week, as soon as we're back in town again.) I'm still not sure I'm saying anything worth actually writing down.

You see, we weren't having sex. Or spanking. And so, you see, I felt increasingly ... well, ugly. Unwanted. Unwomanly. Asexual. It didn't matter that we were being intimate occasionally. Chris does enjoy oral sex (seriously, I don't know any man who doesn't) and he was able to stimulate me to orgasm, though less so as December dragged on and on and on, and my blue-ness and depression sort of worsened.

When it came time to pack for vacation, I wasn't really excited. And I'm afraid my lack of enthusiasm for much of anything contributed to the problem - why would Chris want to be intimate with me when I must have been patently uninterested? To be sure, I was uninterested in anything:  paying attention to him, working consistently, doing housework, cooking, shopping, going to Animal Kingdom and Hollywood Studios...  And I knew why. I just couldn't do anything about it. 

As the weeks passed, and the relationship between my sexuality and my femininity crystallized. I knew what was missing quite keenly (sex, spanking, kink, naked intimacy, hormonal balance, etc) and there I was, making an effort to put a facade on for the world that Christmas was coming and that everything was cheery and glorious.

Chris and I had proper sex for the first time in nearly two months on Christmas night. It was in a strange bed, in a different state, and I was so relieved I almost cried. It'd been so long that we had to think even about the position, and clearly Chris's wrist is out of shape. Boxing Day saw a repeat. Monday was a lost cause - the 20 hours spent fighting airports and airplanes and traveling was a loss - despite the best of plans I was just happy to collapse onto my own pillow last night and Chris was already snoring.

He woke me up at 5:30 this morning to fuck my ass.

I think that might have been the best Christmas present yet.

I realized this morning that, despite a vicious cold virus, I feel almost whole again. I haven't been spanked yet (staying with family and all) though we have plans to do that in a bit when the princess is off on a playdate. It promises to be a significantly painful event, made more so by my near-virgin bottom, his itchy palm and my recent acknowledgment that a significant spanking (and other bottom-related attention-getting activities) would help balance me.

So now I am wondering how I can break this sad link I have made in my head. Clearly I am a woman, whether I am celibate or sexually active. But feeling like I am not one - or less of one than I ought to be - is clearly getting in the way of my productivity, cheerfulness and wifely compatibility.

Help!

 

~~~~

* According to WordPress, I spelled femininity, interrupted, and gynecological all right on the first try! Whee! I even checked to be sure spell check was on!

Posted by sparkle on 28 December 2010 at 12:25 PM in Feminism, Health, Slice of life, sparkle, Travel | Permalink | Comments (17) | TrackBack (0)

Toyland

Since I'm writing this on Christmas, the title seemed appropriate.

I've been thinking a lot this week about different implements and the images or feelings they evoke. In my mind, there are some that are very traditionally "domestic discipline" types of implements, and some that I could only put in the "S&M" category -- they "feel" more like a sexualized, eroticized implement, to me, and I don't understand their appeal. Let me explain ...

Continue reading "Toyland" »

Posted by Angie on 25 December 2010 at 09:08 AM in Angie, Discipline, Implements | Permalink | Comments (7) | TrackBack (0)

Apologies

Master,

I'm really sad today because I feel like I have really failed you recently. I hope in the near future I can prove to you that I can engage and provide you the kind of service you deserve, but I can understand why you might be questioning that.

K told me today that you are out of socks, and that another load of laundry has been discovered with ink on it. I just want you to know I'm really sorry. I don't really even have any words for the situation - every time things fall behind you run out of things, and when I try to rush and catch up things slip through the cracks like with the ink on the laundry.

This is all my fault, and I'm really sorry. I imagine you will punish me if you feel it will help, but regardless I want you to know that I want to make this situation right and I'm working on it. I want to please you, and I'm trying to adjust my habits so that things like this will happen less and less. It shouldn't ever happen, you deserve better than that.


love,

bridget

 

Posted by Bridget on 16 December 2010 at 12:00 PM in Bridget, Slice of life | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

PB 2010 Closing Days -- Opening Lines

Calendar [I got the idea for this blog post from padme's blog (and she got it from viemoira's who got it from -- well you get the idea --) and it seemed like a fun idea. I did it first on my own blog and liked it so much I decided we should have one here too. This blog entry is constructed by taking the opening sentence or two from the first blog post of each month.]

We missed Love Our Lurkers this year, but I though the PB could offer a Thank You to our readers and also play along with this way to close the blog for 2010 and ring in 2011.  I didn't note who wrote what because, well that's not the point and it's on the posts anyway.  Thanks for being with us in 2010 -- I'm looking forward to where 2011 takes us.

January: I've had this plan for a while now to write about topics other than specific punishments. There are a lot of things that float around in my head and some day I will have some spare time and be able to actually sit down and write about some of them.

February: Parenting kids in a kinky household really is different. I suppose everyone experiences parenthood differently, but I think kinksters definitely have unique challenges.

March:  Last week (at least it was last week when I started this post) I read Jessica Wakeman's piece over at The Frisky about her first D/s relationship and was going to write about the similarities/differences with my own first spanking relationship. 

April: I've been organizing the books in our apartment, as they are threatening to take over the place, and I found this gem among Papa Otter's erotica collection.

May: Crashing has a way of putting me in a very Natty mood. And last Wednesday, after a long Mother's Day, a longer ME/CFS Awareness Day, and a trip to the acupuncturist, I crashed.

June: Dear Readers, Please be patient with me as I hash out one of the age old questions of kinky people: What is the purpose of punishment? I am sure you've all seen articles and opinion pieces about this before, but I'm not asking it in general. I'm asking it for myself. Why do Master and I include punishment in our relationship?

July: PB was off this month.  How shameful!

August: This is the first time I've written about this at the time rather than after a restart, maybe because the reason doesn't seem quite as personal as has sometimes been the case.  We're not doing punishment right now.  

September: I am only recently starting to get back my spanking mojo after an extended hiatus for pregnancy- and postpartum-related issues.

October: Chris (of sparkle and Chris) and I have been having a conversation lately about what he as a top gets out of the punishment dynamic.  We thought it made for an interesting post, since we talk a lot about what the bottom gets out of a discipline/punishment arrangement, but we don’t hear about the other side very often (or if we do, it’s from an unrealistic Tops Are Superior Creatures perspective).

November: Today I was thinking about my first time. I guess for most people (read: Vanillas) the “first time” means when they lost their virginity. I could tell you that story but it’s boring and sad.

December: In discipline or punishment terms, I always choose the not-spanking option.

Ring out the old year, ring in the new!  And if you decide to blog your year's opening lines, let us know! 

 

 

Posted by Mija on 15 December 2010 at 11:10 AM in About the PB, Games, Mija, Weblogs | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Vote For Our Zille! 2010 Best New Spankee of the Year

Zille-green-knicks

The lovely blogger and model Zille Defeu (one of the charming and witty PB co-authors) has been nominated on the spankingspot.com as the best new spankee of the year.  

Though I'm not sure "new" quite describes someone with the range and experience of Zille, I'm thrilled for the chance to recognize her film work and encourage you to click here and vote for Zille (or Zillie as they seem to be calling her).  I mean, look at this picture.  Doesn't she clearly deserve it? (To win I mean.  What on earth were you thinking?)

---

Addendum: 

Right after I hit send I thought I'd add this.  In addition to her own blog writing and modeling, Zille has done a lot in the spanking scene this year.  I don't follow her every move (much as that might be great fun) but I've seen her organize the CF-CP spanking party up in San Francisco (and epic fun night) and know she's worked as a volunteer judge for this year's SSC contest.  She's also attended Shadow Lane as well as UK hosted parties.  She and her partner were a great help at helping run errands for the Northern Spanking suite party at Shadow Lane.  

What's my point?  Vote for Zille not because she's got a pretty face.  Vote for her because, in best sense of the term, she's a good all-rounder and gives back to our scene and community.  What more can anyone ask of anyone, spankee or not?

 

Posted by Mija on 10 December 2010 at 05:51 PM in Mija, Surreal, Weblogs, Zille | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

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